“The Conference Con” – Thoughts by Clare Kelso, Conference Consultant and MC
It’s been a long haul. I’ve been working in this business, in Auckland mostly, for over 30 years. In that time we’ve gone from the bratty 80s, where we were dealt with a sharp wake up smack on the bum from a concerned parent, driven by our selfish behaviour, in the crash of ’87, to this recession beating. The difference from our last telling off is that this one seems more like a pounding with a cricket bat from a demented thug. And what have we learnt? Well, it seems not a lot.
Conferencing can be the same dreary thing it was when I started. And what has that to do with the recession? Well, it’s this. Most in-house conferences cost thousands of dollars and most are a waste of time. You can’t afford to throw money away – but if you followed up the delegates a couple of months after a conference the majority wouldn’t remember anything but the great party on the last night when Derek in accounting copped a feel with the receptionist and the entire male management appeared in tutus to sing “I Feel Like a Woman”.
The recession means more belt tightening. So, we must ask ourselves why are we having Conferences at all. All that work. The planning, the booking of flights, the booking of the hotels, the site visits, the speakers, the “must do something new this year” party. The late presentations to add to the data show and the last minute failure of the laptop, sending presenters and techie support into a frenzy. The stress.
I’m not talking myself out of a job. I want you all to have good, successful conferences. So, here’s some rather timely advice – for free!
Before you start ask “WHY ARE WE HAVING THIS CONFERENCE? “. If the answers are – because we always have, they expect it, we need to give out this information – all not really good reasons. Having a great party is a very good reason. When belt tightening is on the agenda your work force can feel left out and undervalued. And they are the people doing the work.
If the conference is mostly info sharing can you give it by other means, e-document or booklet? If you think your employees won’t read it don’t be fooled – they won’t take it in any better from a speaker droning on with endless graphs and dull delivery. And just doing it because it’s expected? It’s the definition of madness to do the same old thing and expect new results.
Do you use music, pictures, colour, smell or taste and humour to get news across, good or bad? Those things are the memory triggers. Not those graphs or text filled screens. Pictures first for public talks supported by strong, witty, shocking, emotional speakers. Getting the lists of text to fly onto the page from the side, up, down or diagonally doesn’t make the text interesting or memorable. That’s the speakers job. Get training for your presenters (yes, of course, from me – you know there’s no such thing as a free lunch) before the conference. A couple of pointers over a couple of hours can make all the difference.
Make sure the room is set up without a central aisle. That’s the most impactful seats in the house for the speaker you’re taking away. A central aisle leaves the speaker talking to no one. And put the screen (if you MUST use them) on one side. The speaker’s emotional content is what the delegates will respond to. And stop putting up posters and banners with your companies name on the wall. They know who they work for. Have flowers, colourful lighting on drapes. Create atmosphere that makes them feel good about being there.
Don’t let your PA, or someone doing an existing job, do all the work. Use a conference organisor. The time and stress saved is worth the cost. Involvement is the key. Delegates must feel they “own” the conference – that they’re not just being talked to. Have a sub committee from all departments to format the programme to include all interested parties.
Structure the conference so the delegates get to actively participate in generating ideas for your company. There’s nothing more motivating than being given responsibility and feeling listened to. Have active sessions involving delegates
Theme your conference to something that will touch your staff in a realistic way. “Simply the Best” was the go-to conference theme of the 80s and 90s with wild haired Tina Turner belting it out to thousands of depressed Kiwis. The modern equivalents are phrases which include words like “Excellence” and “Customer Focused” and “Growing our Business” The delegates hearing these words are thinking – “that just means they’ll put up our sales targets and expect us to work harder, when I hardly see my family now”. How about “Work harder or the Company Will Fold” – honesty is always the best policy.
Include your workforce. This should be their conference and they may have some fabulous ideas to really “grow your business”. Shareholders are important and have taken a knock but most of your staff have a real incentive to keep your business healthy. They need the money for their mortgages, kids education and food on the table. Let them get enthused about their role to help.
Think about having different sessions to help your staff have a richer life and feel more connected to the community. And if you want more info about that or any other of my million ideas how to improve your conference – you just call me. I love to talk and I NEVER use Power Point.
And my last piece of advice? Don’t tell jokes. Use humour within your presentation. Don’t use big openings and closings if the bit in between is dull as dishwater. It’ll just high light that fact. And call me. I know conferencing and I’ll make you laugh. Even if I have to go find that street thug to help.
Clare Kelso is a Conference Facilitator, MC, Actor and Creative Director with ConArtists